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At the park

Walking around piles of fallen leaves, listening to kids playing sports and feeling the wind try to push me around.
I dropped Sweetheart (SW) off. He had a meeting at work even though it is his day off.
I was to go get my eyebrows waxed but was sidetracked by this Indian Summer day.
To find a bench or a picnic table, drink the last of today's methadone, smoke a little, have a cigarette...
Better than the waxing.
My eyebrows aren't going anywhere, this weather is. This is Minnesota with the polar opposite seasons.
But Minneapolis is a beautiful, mostly peaceful, place. I can see trees in any direction when I look out my windows.
And I live downtown.
Besides, I can come here to a park that my grandparents & their parents hung out in. Probably feeling the same soft, comforting autumn sunshine across their skin.
AND THE BREEZE BREAKING THROUGH TO REMIND THEM THAT IT'S NOT GOING TO LAST.



Time to go see SW.
Hope he's in a good mood.
And so on and so on.

(*
Hello.
I didn't go to prison and I didn't die (obviously). I'm quite sure, however, that I have "lost" my mind. Those who know me well agree. Unfortunately.
I am exising on love, hope, faith and methadone.
I live under the premise that my thoughts are not rational. Actually, that's what I'm told.
Sometimes,I don't know what to believe. My memory has not been very reliable lately.
I want to know the truth. I need to get better to be healthy and free.
Here, I can attempt to put the pieces together.
I think I might like being here where I can hide in plain sight :)

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